My Zen Moment of the Day

Raising teenagers is like trying to nail jello to a tree.

Truer words were never said.

Lid Blown On Women's Toilet Habits

OK, now here's a story worth blogging about.

Women's toilet habits. Specifically, women's public toilet habits.

It's a pet peeve of mine...ladies, how can you be such pigs when you are going to the bathroom? I have had to wait my turn in the ladies room many times, and many times an impeccibly dressed woman has exited the stall...you know the kind. Beautiful clothes, shoes; hair and makeup just right. Sometimes young, sometimes old. Race doesn't seem to be a factor. They nod to me as they hold the stall door open...I go in...and there's pee all over the seat.

Lid blown on women's toilet habits

July 28, 2005
From: AAP

IT'S enough to make you wonder why they insist on putting the seat down.
A new survey shows 22 per cent of professional Australian women crouch or squat over the toilets in their workplaces rather than risk contact with the seats.

And another 14 per cent - making more than a third of women overall - wipe the seat first, then crouch over the seat just to be safe.

Forty-six per cent of respondents wiped down the seat with toilet paper if they thought the seat appeared dirty, while 18 per cent simply refused to use their work toilets if they felt they were unclean.

I can't tell you how many times I've gone in to use the bathroom, and there is pee all over the seat, all over the floor, the toilet is left unflushed, etc. Do these women live like this at home?

What's worse, though, is the thought of some little minimum-wager earner having to go in there at the end of the day, and clean up after everybody.

I have Crohn's Disease and not using the bathroom at that time is usually not an option for me. Not sure if you know about Crohn's, but our bathroom trips are immediate, urgent and without warning.

Sometimes I wonder what happened to common courtesey and common sense. Use seat covers. Buy Clorox Wipes and carry them with you. There are ways around these nasty little germs that live on toilet seats.

If you feel you just can't make contact with that toilet seat, go ahead and hover over it. But use the muscles your maker gave you, stand still and AIM. And for God's sake, if you pee on the toilet seat, wipe it up.

I think that Dave Barry was making fun of the study (who thinks of these things??), but it touched a nerve in me.

Thanks to Dave Barry's blog, who has a link to what seems to be the Austrailian News Service.

PLEASE HELP Missing Girl in Marin County, CA

Cheryl Ann Magner

From ChristmasGhost, via Jay at Stop the ACLU; this girl is the niece of ChristmasGhost.

This is a photo of Cheryl Ann Magner.

She has been missing since the beginning of June. She was last seen in Marin County, Ca.

Please, anyone who has seen this 17 year-old girl please call 415-472-2994. This is her mother’s phone number…please do not call unless you have information that would be helpful.

Or call the San Rafael police dept. @ 415-485-3000 or www.srpd.org.
Any information or help would be greatly appreciated by the family.

UPDATE: The phone number for the Marin County Sheriff’s department is (415) 479-1601; you can contact that number too. (Thanks to Mill Valley Mom.)

ALSO: Anonymous tips can be called in to the Bay Area Crimestoppers at 1-800-2 GIVE INFO (1-800-244-8346).

:!: Please help spread the word :!:

Out of the Mouths of Babes

This was sent to me in an email, and I thought this was so funny...but also so true.

'Moses came down with the Ten Amendments, which were God's Bill of Wrongs.'
- Susie F., age 7

France Raises Terror Alert

This came to me in an email...made me laugh out loud. I love being anti-PC. I beg forgiveness from any persons French whose feelings matter to me....(huh?)

Subject: France Increases Terror Alert (AP)

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from RUN to HIDE. The only two higher levels in France are SURRENDER and COLLABORATE. According to one French official, the change was not so much due to the recent terrorist activity in London but instead precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively disabling its military.

Discovery

Wow.

I hope everybody watched it.

Wow.

GGOOOAAAALLLLL!!!

Pee Goal

The Pee Goal includes a nice pitch, a goal, and a ball on a string. You use your penis to push the ball into the goal, apparently.

Oh wait. Just re-read it. You use your URINE STREAM to push the ball into the goal. It’s about $20 in England, and I suspect you can take this around with you, drop it into a urinal, play a game or two, and then pack it up again. Quite a bit of fun, right?

Thanks to gizmodo.com and Dave Barry for this!

Richard, a.k.a. Clark Kent, a.k.a. A Nice Guy

I saw the following on the net, and it reminded me of my husband...the man it took me almost 40 years to find. A man that I hope is a model for my children; I hope that my daughter finds a husband as wonderful, and I hope that my son treats his wife as Richard treats me.

Richard has told me of the girls who were always his friend, but never more. The girls went for the "bad boys" (I know this for a fact. I married the bad boy. It almost killed me.)

Richard is my hero, my superman. He knows what I need, what I want, even before I do. He refuses to fight with me, even when I'm bitchy and looking for a fight with ANYBODY...he just lets it roll off of his shoulders. He's totally selfless. He dated me, a single mom with one teenager and one adolescent kid, and all three of us had piles and piles of emotional issues...enough baggage to require a large U-Haul to lug it around. And then he proposed, not just to me, but to all of us. We had a big, beautiful wedding. It was magic. And we're soon to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary.

Below is a tribute to the "nice guys". But they don't always finish last. I'm sure sometimes it feels like that to them. But I can tell you I'm extremely grateful to the women who thought they needed something more exciting than Richard. And thanks to Richard for waiting so long for me to find him.

I'm extremely grateful and constantly awed that Richard took a chance on somebody like me. I know I'm a constant challenge to him...mentally, physically, emotionally. He loves me for me, and I love him for him. He's no Tom Cruise, and I'm no Katie Holmes. Thank God for that.

But he is my Clark Kent, and I his Lois Lane. Until we're old and grey, sitting on a front porch in our rockers, watching the grandchildren.

And we're still holding hands.

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming

A Hot Sunday in July

Welcome to high summer. I've decided to make an executive decision and not weed anymore today, at least until after dusk, because the sun is hot and the thermometer is reading up above 90 degrees. I'm not complaining, even though this summer has been especially hard with the addition of my oh-so-special hot flashes. My first summer without a uterus or ovaries. Woot woot.

It's been a tough couple of weeks for us, with cars breaking down, Richard traveling every week, working between sixty and eighty hours, and then coming home to me telling him "the Sable is in the parking lot of the KFC, I couldn't get it started", "I picked up the radiator for the truck so you can put it in now...oh, it's the wrong size? I'll go back and exchange it, so you can spend part of next weekend working on the truck". Max spending all his time in Nanticoke with Kala. Maggie either working or with friends. She also got a tatoo last week. The corn in the garden's growth seems to be stunted; however, the weeds are doing wonderfully. The cat peed in the family room somewhere. The pool is getting algae in it and needs vacuuming. The pool light doesn't work.

Ah, but wait. Just wait a minute.

Let's look at this another way. Richard is traveling a lot, but he has a job (unlike other people). He comes home after a few days away (Carol's husband just passed away). Cars can get fixed...at least we have a car that works most of the time, and soon we'll have new ones). Max is spending a lot of time out of the house, but it's nice to see him smile when he talks about Kala. Maggie is working, which means she will be able to pay off her debt to us. Maggie also has been smiling more lately, due to her friends and a crush she has on somebody. The tatoo...well, she's 18, and it's her body. She may regret it someday (I regret the one I got so many years ago), and I'll try really hard not to say "I told you so". So the corn is growing slowly. I can go down the road five minutes and get fresh picked corn. Weeding the garden gives opportunity to be outside in the fresh air and the sun. The cat...well, there's nothing good about cat pee. Chemicals will fix the pool. Max owes me for driving him all over creation and can vacuum the pool. The light in the pool will draw bugs at night...better we don't turn it on.

What changed my mood today, from looking at the glass half-empty to totally full...it was a bald eagle I saw today, flying about 30 feet above my car. It was so beautiful, so majestic. I watched it fly, just mesmerized by it. I've only every seen three others in the wild, and I always feel the same way...grateful, awestruck and thankful for my surroundings. It's such a powerful symbol to me.

It really put everything in perspective.

Thank you, Mr. Eagle.

Now, back to those weeds.....

My New Hat

I ordered a Club Gitmo hat from rushlimbaugh.com



I can't wait for it to come. I'm going to wear it to our brand-new Starbucks. I hate Starbucks. It's full of uppity people who are too insecure to call a cup of coffee what it is...a cup of coffee.

I'll take a picture while I'm there. Woot woot. A good time will be had by all!

Prayers for Carol and Her Family

Carol, the wonderful muse who writes the blog An American Housewife, lost her husband very suddenly. It was only days ago she was talking about his doctor visit, how he was going to have to take it easy, how she was going to take care of him.

I can only imagine how lost she feels. But I've heard that she is surrounded by family and friends, which can only be good for her.

Please pray for her and her children. And take this as a learning opportunity. We never know what will happen. Love your husband or wife, your children, your family, as much and as often as you can.

Carol, be strong. We love you.

The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

As we come up to this 4th of July, as we celebrate our independence and our freedom, everyone should take at least one moment to thank a serviceperson, either in person or through prayer, for the sacrifices that they have made for our country, and for us.

An American Housewife has a piece today about The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier...and it makes me want to see it. Thank you Carol...you've taught me today.

I'm totally cutting and pasting...not only because it's late, but because I couldn't improve on this post.

Tomb Of The Unknown Soldier

Received this via email from a friend and thought I'd pass it on. I have had the opportunity, many times, to watch this respectful and dignified ceremony. It is a sight to see.

As we are between Memorial Day and the 4th of July, two of the most patriotic and inspiring holidays our nation observes, I thought it would be a good time to send this on. I have seen this ceremony every time I have been to Washington D.C. and the impressiveness of it never pales. It is an awesome site that everyone should see at least once. You will never forget it if you do.

This is really an awesome sight to watch if you've never had the chance .. Very fascinating.

Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

1. How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the
tomb of the Unknowns and why?

21 steps. It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute, which is the
highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

2. How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his
return walk and why?

21 seconds for the same reason as answer number 1

3. Why are his gloves wet?

His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the
rifle.

4. Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time
and if not, why not?

He carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb.
After his march across the path, he executes an about face
and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

5. How often are the guards changed? Guards are changed every thirty minutes, twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?

For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be
between 5' 10" and 6' 2" tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30." Other requirements of the Guard: They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of their lives. They cannot swear in public for the rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform {fighting} or the tomb in any way. After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their lives or give up the wreath pin.

The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat
and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt. There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror.

The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone, nor
watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred. Among the notables are: President Taft, Joe E. Lewis {the boxer} and Medal of Honor winner Audie Murphy, {the most decorated soldier of WWII} of Hollywood fame.

Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for
guard duty.

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD, AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.

In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC, our
US Senate/House took 2 days off with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. They respectfully declined the offer, "No way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin, marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said that guarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can be afforded to a serviceperson. The tomb has been patrolled continuously, 24/7, since 1930.

God Bless and keep them.

The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

As we come up to this 4th of July, as we celebrate our independence and our freedom, everyone should take at least one moment to thank a serviceperson, either in person or through prayer, for the sacrifices that they have made for our country, and for us.

An American Housewife has a piece today about The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier...and it makes me want to see it. Thank you Carol...you've taught me today.

I'm totally cutting and pasting...not only because it's late, but because I couldn't improve on this post.

Tomb Of The Unknown Soldier

Received this via email from a friend and thought I'd pass it on. I have had the opportunity, many times, to watch this respectful and dignified ceremony. It is a sight to see.

As we are between Memorial Day and the 4th of July, two of the most patriotic and inspiring holidays our nation observes, I thought it would be a good time to send this on. I have seen this ceremony every time I have been to Washington D.C. and the impressiveness of it never pales. It is an awesome site that everyone should see at least once. You will never forget it if you do.

This is really an awesome sight to watch if you've never had the chance .. Very fascinating.

Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

1. How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the
tomb of the Unknowns and why?

21 steps. It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute, which is the
highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

2. How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his
return walk and why?

21 seconds for the same reason as answer number 1

3. Why are his gloves wet?

His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the
rifle.

4. Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time
and if not, why not?

He carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb.
After his march across the path, he executes an about face
and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

5. How often are the guards changed? Guards are changed every thirty minutes, twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?

For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be
between 5' 10" and 6' 2" tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30." Other requirements of the Guard: They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of their lives. They cannot swear in public for the rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform {fighting} or the tomb in any way. After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their lives or give up the wreath pin.

The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat
and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt. There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror.

The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone, nor
watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred. Among the notables are: President Taft, Joe E. Lewis {the boxer} and Medal of Honor winner Audie Murphy, {the most decorated soldier of WWII} of Hollywood fame.

Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for
guard duty.

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD, AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.

In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC, our
US Senate/House took 2 days off with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. They respectfully declined the offer, "No way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin, marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said that guarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can be afforded to a serviceperson. The tomb has been patrolled continuously, 24/7, since 1930.

God Bless and keep them.