"Every government interference in the economy consists of giving an unearned benefit, extorted by force, to some men at the expense of others." Ayn Rand

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Karma in Action: Tragic Boating Accident Interrupts Canadian Seal Hunt


Instant Karma's gonna get ya.

From AP:



The annual Canadian seal hunt was marred Saturday by a boat accident in the ice-covered Gulf of St. Lawrence that killed members of the boat's crew, officials said.

"There have been fatalities," fisheries department spokesman Michel Plamondon said, but a precise casualty figure was not available.

Rescue teams recovered three bodies and another person was still missing in the waters north of Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, Canadian media reported.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Max


Max turned 18 yesterday.

He bought a lottery ticket this morning. I had to laugh. He's his mother's son.

There just no damn way my youngest child is 18.

Richard and I are kind of scratching our heads, and looking around going "huh?" (well, that seems to be normal for us some times, in our advancing years :) )

He's saving for a shotgun to go hunting with.



How do they grow up so fast? If I think about it too hard, I get weepy.

Two children, both almost adults.

But, they do still leave their socks all over the house. I guess I can take comfort in that, right? There is still job security for me! Yes!

Karleen and Me

I'm taking a 20 minute break from puppy stuff. I need it. I'm exhausted, actually.

It's been a really long time since I've had a puppy, and she's not even really a little puppy. She's actually a little vacuum cleaner.

I've got to get myself on a good schedule when Fina comes. I've had three days of suspended animation here...nothing but puppy stuff is really getting done. The cats are all on my shit list (literally, ha ha), and Mookie has gotten yelled at a few times today. He gets too happy and doesn't want to listen, and when he's happy, Karleen's happy and pandemonium ensues!

She's going back tomorrow, and every day it's been easier, so I think that it's just going to be me getting into a schedule and being prepared for stuff that will make this all much easier. Actually, when you think about it, that will make life easier, actually.

:)

The Eagle and Osprey Cam


Over at the Blackwater Refuge they have cameras set up at the eagles nest and the osprey nest. No osprey so far, but there is a beautiful eagle family to watch. It's amazing to see so many eagles; I remember when I was a kid, you only saw them in zoos or on tv. Now I actually see them on the side of the road.
This is one of the reasons I so love it here.

Monday, March 24, 2008

The Lost Pit Bull

Driving along the back road from the Home Depot today, I encountered a young pit bull loose in the traffic. Nobody around trying to catch the dog. Nobody looking for the dog. The poor thing was terrified and running in and out of traffic. So, I had to pull over.

She was a bit traumatized, and wouldn't come to me, so I'm thinking about what I've got in the truck. I'd just been to the dollar store, and got a small bag of animal crackers. When I got the bag open, her interest was piqued enough to keep her from running back into the street, even though she wouldn't come near me. I sat down on the curb in the elementary school, and started throwing cookies her way. Aaah, cookies. She liked them. She came a little closer, and a little closer. I held out a cookie, and she slowly came up and took it out of my hand. This whole process took about ten minutes....she really liked the cookies, and decided that I was ok, and let me pet her. Once I did that, she crawled up into my lap, seemingly so happy that somebody was saving her from the busy street. I was relieved that she didn't eat my face off. I was a little hesitant, honestly, but what are you going to do? I had to try.



I got up to get the leash that I keep in my truck, and she wanted no part of that, so we went through the cookie thing again, until I could get the leash on her. I got her to jump up into the truck, and wondered what the hell I was going to do. She seemed sweet and loveable, but I didn't know if it would be safe to take her home overnight. The humane society is closed until tomorrow. I decided to try and find out where she lived. I locked up the truck, and started walking with her. Someone suggested a house where she might be from, and there were two other pits in the back who didn't seem to happy to see me. All I could think of as I went into the gate was please god don't let their chains come loose. I rang the bell, and I knocked on the window....no answer. So I went up and down the street, hoping someone would recognize this little girl.

Finally, out comes this woman from the first house, saying that the dog was hers. The dog seems to know her, and was happy to see her. Honestly, the woman could have been a little more grateful, actually.) But I couldn't let that poor little girl be darting in an out of traffic and not do anything about it. Goodness she was a sweetheart. I wish I could describe how she was sitting in my lap and loving being petted.

See, that's why you should always keep cookies and a leash in your car.

Tricia

I've decided I'd like to write about various members of my family...as my last "conversation" (via Aim) was with my niece Tricia, I'll begin with her.

Tricia was just a little one when I met her, so very cute. I probably got to know her faster than I got to know anybody else in Richard's big family, as I had the privilege of having her come over on Wednesdays, while Beth was working. We'd always have some kind of a project to do, and then go to McDonalds for our "Ladies Lunch". Not too long ago, Tricia told me that she still had this little pillow we made with her and Roxy's picture on it. I was so touched that she still had it.

Tricia was the flower girl at my and Richard's wedding, and she was adorable.

On the way up the aisle, she thought she had to scatter the flower petals. Unfortunately, the flowers that were in her basket were wired in, and she had trouble with the last one. She turned to Beth and told her that she couldn't get that last flower out. The whole church laughed, and it set the tone for the rest of the wedding. It was great.

She's growing up so quickly though; each time I see her I realize how fast the time goes by. She and I talk via the computer quite a bit, and I really look forward to it. It's a way to keep in touch, even though we are so far away now. She puts up with all the silly things I tell her, and listens to "funny old aunt margo" and her latest projects. Beth and Dan have done a great job with her; they should be very proud of themselves.

Tricia should be proud of herself too. She's going to go a long way in this world, I have a feeling.
In my heart, she's still that little girl with me at our "ladies lunch", eating french fries with no ketchup, brushing Roxanne with the "luv glove" and laughing. But in my eyes, she's grown up to be a beautiful young lady.


Saturday, March 22, 2008

Baby Names

The today show had a thing on their website about horrible baby names. I think that I'm going to keep these written down somewhere to use as "working" names for when we have the Newfoundland puppies......

Al Caholic
Oliver Clothesoff
I.P. Freely
Seymour Butz
Mike Rotch
Hugh Jass
Amanda Hugginkiss
Ivana Tinkle
Anita Bath
Maya Buttreeks

Fever Bender (born 1856)
Leper Priest (born 1929)
Cholera Priest (born 1830 during the second cholera pandemic)
Rubella Graves (born 1814)
Typhus Black (born 1897)
Hysteria Johnson (born 1881)
Emma Royd (born 1850)
Kathryn E. Coli (born 1894)
Mumps Sykes (born 1891)

These are actual names, from the site ancestry.com

Parents can be so cruel.

(my personal favorite? Maya Buttreeks)

Monday, March 17, 2008

THE PUPPIES THE PUPPIES THE PUPPIES

I now have access to the "big people's" part of the Guiding Eye website....I got to see the puppies. I'm not sure which are the ones that we will be getting, but it is just so exciting to see all of them. Here's two pictures:


This is Reba and her puppies: Jamie, Juliann, Jetta, Janine, Jedi, and Jewel. Here's another picture of just the puppies:


Pat said she thought we'd be getting "K" puppies (all their names will start with K), but the K puppies are German Shepards. So, I'm not sure what lot they'll come from, but as soon as I know..... god they are just so cute.

As this time gets closer, I'm getting more and more excited. Also, more and more nervous. I'm praying I can live up to this responsibility. I think about completing this, and then letting him or her go. I think about it and already I tear up; but like I was saying to Richard last night, it's like a child. You meet all their needs when they are tiny, and then you teach them, and take care of them, until they are ready to go to college. They go, and you let them go, but it hurts to do so. Once college is over, then they go out into the world, and they do their jobs. They live their lives. And you were a big part of that.

Plus, these puppies will never want an advance on their allowance, will never ask to borrow the car, and will never tell you that they are just too busy to clean their rooms.



Facebook

I now have a Facebook, just like all the other cool old ladies.

Actually, the best part is that I put all of these really old pictures on it, and the nieces and children are having a wonderful time seeing old pictures of each other, and seeing stupid pictures of me.

Here's the link: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=573725624

The HGTV Dream Home

Well, we didn't win it.

And the show was one of the most painful hours of television in history. It was like this surreal gameshow from a bad dream.

I didn't clean, and I didn't stay dressed (according to the blog on HGTV, most of the other people watching did); but the heat pumps kept kicking on and I was thinking "maybe they are outside!" I was texting back and forth with Diane during this whole fiasco, and we were both disgusted.

When the winner was finally revealed (after the hyper hostess just walked into her house where they were having a birthday party), the woman was very strange, not happy, just scratching her head. I wonder if she was drunk or had taken a handful of muscle relaxers because she was nervous......such a strange reaction.

But the best part was reading the pages and pages of reactions on the HGTV blog....people are saying that they should take back the house because she was unappreciative, that HGTV is racist because only white people who already have homes and money are the only winners, that it is all a setup because the winner knows who they are before the show. My favorite comment was that someone said that the woman thought she was on "Cheaters" and had gotten caught. Ha ha ha!

Well, as Diane said, Katie and Wanda didn't want to live in Florida anyway. And Richard is too fair to live in the Keys full time anyway.

Damn, it would have been cool. We probably would have kept it for a little bit, and then sold it when the market improved. Had a hell of a family vacation for a little bit!

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Yet Another Dog Joke

One Smart Dog

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are.

The first man was an engineer, the second was an accountant, the third a chemist, and the fourth was a government worker.

To show off, the engineer called to his dog. "T-Square, do your stuff." T-Square trotted over to the desk, took out some paper and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into four equal piles of three cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good.

But the chemist said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop! Everyone agreed that was good.

Then the three men turned to the government worker, and said, "What can your dog do?"

The government worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, "do your stuff." Coffee Break slowly got on his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, crapped on the paper, sexually assaulted the other three dogs, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for workers' compensation, and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

Another Dog Joke

Dog Joke

Here's a good dog joke:

A butcher in his shop, and he's real busy, and he notices a dog in the shop. He shoos him away. But later, he notices the dog is back again. So he goes over to the dog, and notices he has a note in his mouth. He takes the note, and it reads "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please. The dog has money in his mouth, as well." The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten pound note there. So he takes the money, and puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth. The butcher is well impressed, and since it's close to closing time, he decides to shut up shop and follow the dog. So off he goes.

The dog is walking down the street, when he comes to a level crossing. The dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn. They do, and he walks across the road, with the butcher following him all the way. The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the timetable. The butcher is in awe at this stage. The dog checks out the times, and then sits on one of the seats provided. Along comes a bus. The dog walks around the front, looks at the number, and goes back to his seat. Another bus comes. Again the dog goes and looks at the number, notices it's the right bus, and climbs on. The butcher, by now open-mouthed, follows him onto the bus.

The bus travels through the town and out into the suburbs, the dog looking at the scenery. Eventually he gets up, and moves to the front of the bus. He stands on 2 back paws and pushes the button to stop the bus. Then he gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Well, dog and butcher are walking along the road, and then the dog turns into a house. He walks up the path, and drops the groceries on the step. Then he walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He goes back down the path, runs up to the door and -Whap!- throws himself against it again. There's no answer at the house, so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow wall, and walks along the perimeter of the garden. He gets to the window, and beats his head against it several times, walks back, jumps off, and waits at the door.

The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts laying into the dog. Yelling and swearing at him. The butcher runs up, and stops the guy. "What the heck are you doing? That dog is a genius. He could be on TV, for heaven's sake!", to which the guy responds,

"Clever, my foot! This is the second time this week that he's forgotten his key."

Sunday, March 09, 2008

Puppy Training Class One

Well, last Wednesday finally passed, and seven o'clock came, and I got to go to my first class. Wow, this is going to be hard. But I'm still as excited as I was before...even more. Barbara and Randy were nice to have it at their home in Milton, DE. It's about an hour and fifteen minute drive from home. Pat, the regional director, was there. She's going to teach us how to do this!

The first hour we watched a short video, and heard about "do's" and "don'ts". Know what some of the "don'ts" are?

  • Don't ever give the dog any human food. Never. Ever.
  • Don't ever let the dog up on furniture.
  • In the car, the dog must ride on the passenger side floorboard.
  • A male dog must never be allowed to learn to lift his leg.
That was just a few of the things that we're going to be learning how to (and how not to) do. How do you teach a dog not to lift it's leg? I always thought it was instinctual, but Pat (the trainer) said no, it's a learned behavior.

I hope we get a female. Then we only have to deal with two heat cycles per year.

After the first hour, we did a few training exercises. The first one was funny. I was the trainer, and another man was the dog. I was shown the thing that I had to get him to do (it was shake his head from side to side); the trick was that all I could say was the word "Yes" and give him kibble (hard candies, in this instance).

This was so hard. I was glad that I really wasn't any worse than anybody else. We all laughed really hard though, because the "dogs" would be doing these silly things that they thought were what we wanted. You would wait until they did something similar to what you really wanted, and reward them. Then they would do it again. Again, you would reward them. They would then do it a third time. You don't reward them. Then they know that they have to keep trying.

Pat and Barbara said you will see this on the dog's faces...they think they think they think...they've got it!

Then they brought in the dogs. There was Kramer, who was the puppy I met at the first meeting (he's with Barbara and Randy). Then there was Lamont, who is a ten year old retired guide dog, and such a sweetie. Then there were three other dogs, all over a year old, one of them getting ready to go to "college". I got to work with Lamont.

This is Lamont. He's brilliant.

We played "touch". You get the dog's attention, hold up your hand, palm out, and say "touch". The dog touches his nose to your hand. As he does it, you say Yes, and then reward him.

No matter where you put your hand, he will find it and he will touch it with his nose. Imagine! I was so so so impressed. And all of this for a piece of plain kibble. Roxanne would have only done it for a healthy slice of lasagna.

I'm looking forward to next Wednesday; Max will be coming with me, and possibly Richard. Maybe maggie too, if she's not working. We'll see.

We'll be getting a home visit, and a trial puppy for about three days. Can't wait.

I think that the puppy is going to have a way easier time then me, Richard, Maggie and Max. We currently treat dogs like humans. We're going to have to learn to treat them like dogs. It's going to be hard!

Thursday, March 06, 2008

It's What's For Dinner



Frankfurter Spectacular.
From the 1970's Weight Watchers Cooking Cards.
Yum.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

How Can This Not Make You Laugh

Don't send a lame eCard. Try JibJab Sendables!

Happy St. Paddy's Day

For our Irish Holiday, I give you my husband and my sister's-in-law......



I love Richard's face, and the way he leaps off the stage.....

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Brett Favre


It is truly a sad day, both here in Salisbury, and in Green Bay.

It just won't be the same.

My Favorite Joke

A guy sees an ad for a talking dog for sale, $20.

He goes to the address wondering why someone would be selling a talking dog.

He gets to the house and knocks on the door and a man answers the door. He asks if he came about the ad for the talking dog and the other man says --"Yes, I did."

The man says the dog is in the back room watching television.

The guy who had read the ad headed to the back room and sees a dog lying on a bed watching TV. The dog looks at him and says "Hello".

The guy is amazed that this dog can talk so he asks the dog to tell him about itself.

The dog tells him that he was the only talking dog in his litter and that he had been adopted by a family and stayed with them for awhile then when the World Trade Center was destroyed, he volunteered to search for survivors. A few years after that, he went down south to help look for survivors after Hurricane Katrina. Then he went on to tell how he went to college to study medicine and found a cure for cancer and won the Nobel Prize and then went on a lecture tour.
When the US went to war with Iraq, he went there to hunt terrorists and had personally sniffed out where Saddam Hussein was hiding.

He said he felt like he had done enough and had decided to retire.

The guy goes back out to the man who had placed the ad--"Why are you selling this talking dog so cheap? You could make millions off a talking dog like this!"
The other guy said "Yeah, I know."
"So why are you selling him then?"
The man says--"Because he is a big liar."


Monday, March 03, 2008

Employee of the Week

This is my very favorite calling-in-sick trick of all time.

Washington State Detectives Say Man Asked Friend to Shoot Him in the Arm So He Could Skip Work

Sat Mar 1, 7:35 AM ET

PASCO, Wash. - What happened to faking a cough?

Sheriff's detectives in Franklin County, Washington, say a man had his friend shoot him in the shoulder so he wouldn't have to go to work.

When he first spoke with deputies, Daniel Kuch told them he'd been the victim of a drive-by shooting while he was jogging Thursday. But detectives say Kuch later acknowledged that he asked a friend to shoot him so he could get some time off work and avoid a drug test.

The friend has been arrested for investigation of reckless endangerment. Kuch is expected to be charged with false reporting.

Detectives aren't saying where Kuch works or whether he still has a job.

Brilliant.